At least that's what I thought," I laughed."Then you decided to have a little fun and that's when I walked in, is that it?" Yes, and while I didn't think so at the time, it's been the nicest thing that's happened to me in quite a while," I said and I kissed her again.She did pull back after a minute, telling me, "Well, you did come here to work. Maybe I can help you." You help me just being like this, Alex," as I nodded down to her bared breasts."Well, I suppose I could stay this way if you. I knew Monika for a few years, she was a frequent visitor at our place, and each and every time she visited, she told my mom that she had found the perfect guy, and that the last one was just not right for her. She always had these short term "relationships" going on. A few days after my mom called her, it was saturday, she told me that I could step by Monikas place any time today. So I went to the bus stop and drove to her place. Monika lived in rather nice part of our city and had quite the. .”And I melted down. Hung my butt on a stool at the bar, put my head in my arms and cried.Derek heard me. Yes, he’s an icky little brother at possibly the worst age possible, but he came to my aid.“Sis? Tara?” he said softly, touching my arm.I said nothing, just sobbed.“I know, Sis,” he said. “It’s hard. You need somebody to talk to.”“Who?”“Somebody ‘sides me. Kara, maybe. Rachel said Kara lost her mom.”“I dunno. It’s late. Just leave me alone...”“No, Sis. I love you. I’m gonna help.”He. She's restrained, with her face directly over the phone, so she can't pick it up. On the inside, she is crying. A part of her wants to pick up the phone and tell Max that she misses him, and that she will be back home to spend the holidays with him. But as she looks at herself in the mirror on top of the chest of drawers, she knows that part of herself is slowly dying, and that she is now being taken over, as Jonathan Haidt* would put it, by her elephant. She and Max had not spoken much of.
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